Okay, Madeline did her job very well. Coming back from my job at the club, and only slightly intoxicated, I came across a sight that just proves that Maddie knows more then she's letting on. Deren, quite happily stumbling home with one arm wrapped around some guy's waist (I think he visited the club a few times), laying light kisses on his neck. He was giggling like some pretty girl, and the other dude was definitely enjoying it, since at every few kisses he would pull Deren closer and speed up.
Was I like that?
Well, I definitely wasn't heading home for at least another couple of hours. The walls in my apartment aren't thick, and Deren only lives down a floor. I do not want to be hearing that while I try to sleep. So instead I mooch around for a bit, and head back later.
Of course, to tell Maddie exactly what I had found out.
So I told her. She should have heard her squeal. She started reeling out lists of people she should set him up with, since she had to find him his 'one true love'. The worrying this was that I was quite high on this list. Sorry, but commitment isn't my thing unfortunately.
Wait, why didn't she try and do this to me when she found out I was gay?
And why does being gay matter?!
Bloody strange girl.
Wednesday, 9 April 2008
Tuesday, 8 April 2008
8th April 2008
So, I visisted Deren. It didn't start well, since the first thing he did when he saw me was blush and slam the door in my face again. But you know me, never one to give up when a friend is in need ... Or I have nothing better to do. So, I knock on the door again, and knock, and knock, and knock ... And before it drives me insane, Deren opens the door again looking slightly demented. Me, with my suave good looks, charm myself inside his home ... Or slip through the door while he's yelling at me and hasn't had the chance to close it again.
I've never before loved being this skinny.
Anyway, he yells at me some more, which was bloody boring! He kept repeating himself, over and over again! I was yawning by the end, before he finally made a decent point. Well, not so much decent as it gave me a chance to reply. 'And I'm bloody straight!' Now, I can't remember when we got onto the subject of what happened those few nights ago ... Damn, my memory is terrible, I can't even remember when it happened. Anyway, we're talking about it anyhow so I should at least get a word in, since I was involved. So instead of my brilliant wit, he actually got a serious reply, which was quite an amazing thing from me. 'We don't know ourselves the best, it's the people around you who know you really.' What a brilliant spark of wisdom!
... That I heard Maddie say once.
And it's a load of crap. I know Deren's straight, it's only Maddie who's got this strange notion that he's gay. But hell, I wanted him to stop yelling because God he was loud! Perhaps me actually being serious would shock him into silence.
No such chance.
I'll save you all the details of the argument, in which I pride myself on not shouting once ... Except when he insulted my hair. I don't care if it's ginger now, no-one insults the hair! It was a lowblow anyway!
Well on with the story ... When someone is trying to convince you that they are straight, you will be very, very surprised what you will find out about their sex life. Seriously, it's worrying. They will tell you anything to convince you that they are 100% straight, and have no interest in the same sex and I believed him in the first place! I never wanted to know some of the things he told me.
I really can't be bothered to type this all out, so we'll cut it short. By the end, Deren was determined to kill Madeline and I was quite happy to let him. Perhaps not help though.
I've never before loved being this skinny.
Anyway, he yells at me some more, which was bloody boring! He kept repeating himself, over and over again! I was yawning by the end, before he finally made a decent point. Well, not so much decent as it gave me a chance to reply. 'And I'm bloody straight!' Now, I can't remember when we got onto the subject of what happened those few nights ago ... Damn, my memory is terrible, I can't even remember when it happened. Anyway, we're talking about it anyhow so I should at least get a word in, since I was involved. So instead of my brilliant wit, he actually got a serious reply, which was quite an amazing thing from me. 'We don't know ourselves the best, it's the people around you who know you really.' What a brilliant spark of wisdom!
... That I heard Maddie say once.
And it's a load of crap. I know Deren's straight, it's only Maddie who's got this strange notion that he's gay. But hell, I wanted him to stop yelling because God he was loud! Perhaps me actually being serious would shock him into silence.
No such chance.
I'll save you all the details of the argument, in which I pride myself on not shouting once ... Except when he insulted my hair. I don't care if it's ginger now, no-one insults the hair! It was a lowblow anyway!
Well on with the story ... When someone is trying to convince you that they are straight, you will be very, very surprised what you will find out about their sex life. Seriously, it's worrying. They will tell you anything to convince you that they are 100% straight, and have no interest in the same sex and I believed him in the first place! I never wanted to know some of the things he told me.
I really can't be bothered to type this all out, so we'll cut it short. By the end, Deren was determined to kill Madeline and I was quite happy to let him. Perhaps not help though.
Monday, 7 April 2008
7th April 2008
Maddie sure is something else.
And not in the good way.
So, she comes in, and asks why she hasn't seen Deren in a while. Now, luckily for her, I am one to kiss and tell, since it’s no fun otherwise, especially if I don’t remember the night before. So I tell her everything, including how he stormed out. So do you know what she does? Cheers! I kid you not; she actually cheers, and does the whole clapping thing and acts like an excited school girl.
What the hell do you do when a usually very … Well, not stoic but … un-excited-school-girl girl starts acting like that? Join in? So I just sit there, very confused and let her do her whole cheery moment before making her explain. So she does. And guess what?
She had planned this!
Not to get at me, oh no! She knew this wouldn’t bother me in the slightest, but Deren is a completely different matter. According to her, Deren has been in denial of his sexuality for a while. I think she’s talking a loud of shit, because I seem to be able to pick out a gay guy in a crowded room, but if that’s what she thinks, I’ll let her. Anyway, she got Deren drunk. Very drunk. Not drunk enough to not be able to walk, but drunk enough to get him into bed with me if she … pushed him a little bit. So, according to her, she bet him that he wouldn’t kiss me.
She lost out on a bit of money, but she said it was worth it.
Apparently this was her big scheme to get her back for that foil prank.
Now usually I wouldn’t mind but I saw the look on Deren’s face as he left. And I don’t know if it’s just me … But he looked scared.
I guess my life is slowly turning into some cheesy TV programme, eh? Perhaps Friends … Nah, that would make us Ross and Rachel or something, and that’s a little strange.
Anyway, tomorrow … I’m gonna find Deren. It’s been two days since I’ve seen him, and I think it’s time to set him straight. I don’t think Maddie told him about her little plan.
And not in the good way.
So, she comes in, and asks why she hasn't seen Deren in a while. Now, luckily for her, I am one to kiss and tell, since it’s no fun otherwise, especially if I don’t remember the night before. So I tell her everything, including how he stormed out. So do you know what she does? Cheers! I kid you not; she actually cheers, and does the whole clapping thing and acts like an excited school girl.
What the hell do you do when a usually very … Well, not stoic but … un-excited-school-girl girl starts acting like that? Join in? So I just sit there, very confused and let her do her whole cheery moment before making her explain. So she does. And guess what?
She had planned this!
Not to get at me, oh no! She knew this wouldn’t bother me in the slightest, but Deren is a completely different matter. According to her, Deren has been in denial of his sexuality for a while. I think she’s talking a loud of shit, because I seem to be able to pick out a gay guy in a crowded room, but if that’s what she thinks, I’ll let her. Anyway, she got Deren drunk. Very drunk. Not drunk enough to not be able to walk, but drunk enough to get him into bed with me if she … pushed him a little bit. So, according to her, she bet him that he wouldn’t kiss me.
She lost out on a bit of money, but she said it was worth it.
Apparently this was her big scheme to get her back for that foil prank.
Now usually I wouldn’t mind but I saw the look on Deren’s face as he left. And I don’t know if it’s just me … But he looked scared.
I guess my life is slowly turning into some cheesy TV programme, eh? Perhaps Friends … Nah, that would make us Ross and Rachel or something, and that’s a little strange.
Anyway, tomorrow … I’m gonna find Deren. It’s been two days since I’ve seen him, and I think it’s time to set him straight. I don’t think Maddie told him about her little plan.
6th April 2008
Well, I had to leave you on a bit of a cliffhanger there. Apologies on my part, but I barely had time to type out that last word before … Well, before a quite confused Deren disappeared once more, to go put himself into some clothes. I didn’t mention that he was naked before? Oh well.
Okay, so he comes out, in all his naked glory, having obviously not realised where he was. Now, it’s not unusual for either of us to wind up in someone else’s bed with no idea how we got there, since we’re both pretty sluttish. What can I say; we’re just brilliant that way. On with the story, before I start pointing out all my lovely features. Anyway, so he looks at me, blinks, and runs back into my bedroom. At this point I’m laughing, though I’m still not sure why. Just so you all know, I’m wearing clothes … If those clothes happen to be a pale blue dressing gown and … that’s it.
He comes out again, a pair of boxers on this time and struggling into some proper clothes, ready to yell his head off at me. I greet him with my usual cheery attitude, though I have to say that I’m not at all comfortable with this situation either, since as far as I knew … Deren was straight.
I may have just taken his virginity in that department.
… He better not read this, he’ll brain me.
It started off with my usual sweetness attitude. ‘Have fun last night sweetie?’ and a rather appropriate ‘fuck off’ as a reply. Can’t blame him really, since as far as he knew, he was straight. I just grin at him, in my usual cheery way … And dodge as he runs at me and takes a swing.
What a bastard!
The usual ‘what the hell happened?’ and when I tell him … the usual denial. Why is it that first-timers always deny it, like we ended up in bed together, butt-naked and didn’t have sex? Bloody hell, it’s pure naivety! Still, he’s my friend, so I put up with it … A bit.
I’ll skip you all the boring details of him saying that we didn’t have sex, and trying to think up other reasons of why he ended up in my bed with me, and me bluntly telling him that yes, we did have sex and that no doubt if we looked close enough of the bed we would find proof of that. Unless I was sober enough to clean it up. Unlikely.
Well, that’s basically how yesterday morning went.
Oh crap, Maddie’s here. I’ll blog again tomorrow.
Okay, so he comes out, in all his naked glory, having obviously not realised where he was. Now, it’s not unusual for either of us to wind up in someone else’s bed with no idea how we got there, since we’re both pretty sluttish. What can I say; we’re just brilliant that way. On with the story, before I start pointing out all my lovely features. Anyway, so he looks at me, blinks, and runs back into my bedroom. At this point I’m laughing, though I’m still not sure why. Just so you all know, I’m wearing clothes … If those clothes happen to be a pale blue dressing gown and … that’s it.
He comes out again, a pair of boxers on this time and struggling into some proper clothes, ready to yell his head off at me. I greet him with my usual cheery attitude, though I have to say that I’m not at all comfortable with this situation either, since as far as I knew … Deren was straight.
I may have just taken his virginity in that department.
… He better not read this, he’ll brain me.
It started off with my usual sweetness attitude. ‘Have fun last night sweetie?’ and a rather appropriate ‘fuck off’ as a reply. Can’t blame him really, since as far as he knew, he was straight. I just grin at him, in my usual cheery way … And dodge as he runs at me and takes a swing.
What a bastard!
The usual ‘what the hell happened?’ and when I tell him … the usual denial. Why is it that first-timers always deny it, like we ended up in bed together, butt-naked and didn’t have sex? Bloody hell, it’s pure naivety! Still, he’s my friend, so I put up with it … A bit.
I’ll skip you all the boring details of him saying that we didn’t have sex, and trying to think up other reasons of why he ended up in my bed with me, and me bluntly telling him that yes, we did have sex and that no doubt if we looked close enough of the bed we would find proof of that. Unless I was sober enough to clean it up. Unlikely.
Well, that’s basically how yesterday morning went.
Oh crap, Maddie’s here. I’ll blog again tomorrow.
Saturday, 5 April 2008
5th April 2008
Ow. Headache. Major.
Bloody hangovers.
Just staring at this screen is playing havoc on my head. Is there any way to turn the brightness down on this screen? No? Shit. This screen is going to make me throw up. I’ll see if I can’t get this blog out before I start retching all over the keyboard. That might take some skill, as I really don’t feel well already. Let’s see how long I can keep my food down.
Well, as you might be able to tell last night I got very drunk. I can’t really remember what happens. Alcohol still affects me just as it would any other human, and unfortunately I’m a real lightweight so it doesn’t take much to get me absolutely hammered. I can be a bit of a strange drunk, but my friends know how to deal with me, so it’s fine. Usually they just dump me on some willing guy or girl and carry on their merry way. Bastards.
… I wonder if that happened last night? I just kinda … stumbled out of bed to throw up. Didn’t really look and see if there was anyone next to me. I really should go check. I seriously hope not, because I really can’t be assed with getting them some aspirin and some water. I’m the one needing it right now.
Oh wait, someone’s coming out.
… Deren?!
Bloody hangovers.
Just staring at this screen is playing havoc on my head. Is there any way to turn the brightness down on this screen? No? Shit. This screen is going to make me throw up. I’ll see if I can’t get this blog out before I start retching all over the keyboard. That might take some skill, as I really don’t feel well already. Let’s see how long I can keep my food down.
Well, as you might be able to tell last night I got very drunk. I can’t really remember what happens. Alcohol still affects me just as it would any other human, and unfortunately I’m a real lightweight so it doesn’t take much to get me absolutely hammered. I can be a bit of a strange drunk, but my friends know how to deal with me, so it’s fine. Usually they just dump me on some willing guy or girl and carry on their merry way. Bastards.
… I wonder if that happened last night? I just kinda … stumbled out of bed to throw up. Didn’t really look and see if there was anyone next to me. I really should go check. I seriously hope not, because I really can’t be assed with getting them some aspirin and some water. I’m the one needing it right now.
Oh wait, someone’s coming out.
… Deren?!
Friday, 4 April 2008
4th April 2008
Oh hell, I love dogs.
Yes, I realise that is completely random but I do. So much. Before today, they were big rats but today ... Oh, they're brilliant creatures! Absolutely wonderful! I have to get a pet dog! Seriously! I need one, badly!
... Perhaps I should explain, no?
Well, I never liked dogs before. Actually, I never really paid much attention to them. You didn't really see a lot of them if you mainly travelled by night. But today, I was out in the daylight, since Deren had decided to drag me out. Don't ask me why, since we didn't actually get anything done and he told me no reason for it, but nevermind. So anyway, he's blabbering away as we walk down the street, like he does, and we see this dog. Adorable thing it was, after I got a look at it. I ignored it for the first part.
Anyway, we're walking past it and it came over, though I have no idea why. Nuzzles Deren's leg, causing me to say he had a new admirer, and he glared at the creature. He pushed it away gently with his foot, which is a great achievement for him since rationality is not one of his strong points, before it nuzzles him again.
And bye bye rationality.
He kicks it backwards, and it bites him. Cutting skin and all. I fell about laughing as he tried to shake the dog from his foot, but it wasn't exactly a small one. Maybe coming up to my mid-thigh. Anyway, it clings on for dear life, completely shredding his shoes and cutting up his foot something bad. I was still laughing as it's owner rushed out of some store, apologising for the dog's behaviour, and took the thing home.
So now, guess what?
Deren has a huge fear of dogs.
Can you see why I want one?
Payback.
Yes, I realise that is completely random but I do. So much. Before today, they were big rats but today ... Oh, they're brilliant creatures! Absolutely wonderful! I have to get a pet dog! Seriously! I need one, badly!
... Perhaps I should explain, no?
Well, I never liked dogs before. Actually, I never really paid much attention to them. You didn't really see a lot of them if you mainly travelled by night. But today, I was out in the daylight, since Deren had decided to drag me out. Don't ask me why, since we didn't actually get anything done and he told me no reason for it, but nevermind. So anyway, he's blabbering away as we walk down the street, like he does, and we see this dog. Adorable thing it was, after I got a look at it. I ignored it for the first part.
Anyway, we're walking past it and it came over, though I have no idea why. Nuzzles Deren's leg, causing me to say he had a new admirer, and he glared at the creature. He pushed it away gently with his foot, which is a great achievement for him since rationality is not one of his strong points, before it nuzzles him again.
And bye bye rationality.
He kicks it backwards, and it bites him. Cutting skin and all. I fell about laughing as he tried to shake the dog from his foot, but it wasn't exactly a small one. Maybe coming up to my mid-thigh. Anyway, it clings on for dear life, completely shredding his shoes and cutting up his foot something bad. I was still laughing as it's owner rushed out of some store, apologising for the dog's behaviour, and took the thing home.
So now, guess what?
Deren has a huge fear of dogs.
Can you see why I want one?
Payback.
Thursday, 3 April 2008
3rd April 2008
Work was hell.
I mean it. Absolute hell. I usually love my job, sitting behind the bar, flirting with everything pretty that comes near me. I daren't today. I got so ridiculed ... They all thought it was hilarious that my hair was this horrible colour. Thought it extremely entertaining. That was, until I put itching powder in all their coats and jackets. Bastards, I hope they itch their skin right off.
Okay, not very original, but I didn't have much time to plan.
Anyway, I come in, hoping that they don't say anything about it, because they know how much I loved my hair. But no, I come in, they see, and they laugh. Just laugh! They don't say a damn word, just stand there, bent double, laughing until they cry.
You have no idea how close I was to quitting right then.
Bloody bastards ... Usually I would be taking the piss out of myself, but this was my hair! I couldn't bear the thought of not having my beautiful hair, never mind taking the piss out of myself for it. No, I just told them that if they didn't shut up I was going to lock them in one of the upstairs rooms and leave 'em there until someone managed to stumble in. They shut up.
I swear, I am not going to rest until I get Maddie back for this.
I mean it. Absolute hell. I usually love my job, sitting behind the bar, flirting with everything pretty that comes near me. I daren't today. I got so ridiculed ... They all thought it was hilarious that my hair was this horrible colour. Thought it extremely entertaining. That was, until I put itching powder in all their coats and jackets. Bastards, I hope they itch their skin right off.
Okay, not very original, but I didn't have much time to plan.
Anyway, I come in, hoping that they don't say anything about it, because they know how much I loved my hair. But no, I come in, they see, and they laugh. Just laugh! They don't say a damn word, just stand there, bent double, laughing until they cry.
You have no idea how close I was to quitting right then.
Bloody bastards ... Usually I would be taking the piss out of myself, but this was my hair! I couldn't bear the thought of not having my beautiful hair, never mind taking the piss out of myself for it. No, I just told them that if they didn't shut up I was going to lock them in one of the upstairs rooms and leave 'em there until someone managed to stumble in. They shut up.
I swear, I am not going to rest until I get Maddie back for this.
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